THE CUTTING EDGE: If Not Here, then Where?

  
There are certain moments in our lives when it becomes extremely important to us to  have the attention and energy and focus of another.  We have a sense of need, of urgency...and, if that need is not met, we struggle with feeling lost, alone, frustrated, possibly even abandoned.  The dominant perception we experience at this point is the feeling of:  Where were you?  I needed you.  You were not here for me.

And, from the outward look of things, that interpretation seems right on.  They were not WITH us.  They were not HERE.  


But, WHERE, then, were they?  And the answer to that question holds some very important information ABOUT the person who APPEARED to leave us standing in distress  and also FOR the person who was requesting their attention.

But we usually don't travel down that path of information gathering, staying mired  instead in the chaotic energy of these reactions...

YOU didn't answer me.
YOU weren't listening.
YOU don't care about how I feel.
 
 
But the very fact that someone has "left the building" in our hour of need points to the existence of an unresolved quagmire, a fear or anxiety or, perhaps, a need as great or greater than ours that has been buried but is still making unmistakable sounds of protest.  And what looks like a conscious decision on the part of another that we are not important to them may be an unrelenting, subconscious echo that is their distinct cry for help that has somehow gotten buried and is now revealing  itself in an awkward way, drawing attention away from the crisis of OUR moment of need.

And yet it seems there may be a SPIRITUAL connection between our need and the issue that is subtly trumping our cry for assistance.  And, by pausing to consciously give our full attention to what is manifesting in another's behavior, we may find information that illuminates issues in the relationship, softens our energy and inspires our compassion regarding the pain or distress that has captured our companion's attention.

And, when this new tenderness graces our heart, it is not long before it is returned in kind to us and both parties find it possible to honor what is important to each other.


The behavior I describe requires an intense stepping up from and beyond the pain that is tugging at our heart.  Not a typical response when it feels like someone is walking away

 
It is not easy to maintain an awareness of others when we are feeling lost in the turbulent sea of our own emotions.  But strength of character, the ability to widen our perspective and the wisdom to trust that the Universe connects us all provides access to the unfolding of the highest good for all involved.  
 
Cutting edge.  Stunning personal evolution.



                                                     Marie Helena 





image from enotes.com

Hot Pink Gloves and the Boomeranging Bands

                       

Last Monday I sat waiting in my podiatrist’s office for his nurse to take an impression of my feet for a new set of inserts for my shoes.  I have cuboid bones that randomly like to “relocate”, launching parties of misalignment, inviting my knees and sacrum to go rogue and join in the fun.  Needless to say, my visits to the podiatrist (though wonderfully philosophical) are serious and necessary.  So, on this day, I was expecting a rather scientific procedure coming my way when in walked the doc’s nurse waving hot pink rubber gloves in the air which matched none of her attire and, therefore, seemed incongruous and rather hilarious.

It wasn’t long before I could see how perfectly they suited her persona because she immediately launched into a vaudeville routine as she began the work of preparing me for the impression.  As she delightfully performed for her audience of one, she made a point of warning me that the black elastic bands she was about to use to secure my plaster booties have been known on occasion to boomerang off the walls.  As if to highlight their adventurous nature, the black cords sported a blue bauble on them and I was struck by how prettily they accented the hot pink gloves even while I could hardly keep from laughing as every comment she made seemed to outdo the humor of the previous retort. 

Now, mind you, I was supposed to be sitting still and relaxing during this procedure and this was no easy task since the doc’s nurse was so funny and entertaining.  After she finished her work on my feet, she ceremoniously took an elegant Shakespearean bow at the doorway and invited the doc back into the room, announcing him as the next act with an excellent vaudeville-worthy introduction.

OMG, I thought...what great fun this was!  The energy...the delight...the unexpectedness of it all.  I found myself wishing I could program my entire day in this exhilarating vibration and then wondered...why not?  Of course I could do this.  The routine performance of our daily tasks usually feels like punching a notch on our to-do belt.  You know...that heavy belt that grows more cumbersome as the day progresses.

Where are our hot pink rubber gloves?  Our boomeranging black elastic bands? Our Shakespearean bows?  The FLOURISH of ourimagination?

Tomorrow I awake with a new Shakespearean mantra:

The game’s afoot.  Let us have pomp and circumstance!



                                                   Marie Helena

image from moziru.com

                                                

The Intersection

The term intersection usually refers to a place where two streets cross each other.  In the intersection, it is very important that certain guidelines be observed by all parties approaching it to ensure that traffic moves easily and safely.

As I reflect on the concept of an intersection, I can see that these convergences occur much more frequently in our lives than when we are traveling. Intersections occur every time we encounter another person and, in these moments, our mental/ emotional state is especially important as we take in what is occurring in the course of action.

Naturally and, of course, importantly, our first reaction/response to what is happening in the intersection will center on what we are feeling.  Our first responsibility is always to take care of ourselves. But it seems there is an additional way we can help ourselves in this instance and that is by making a very important assumption about everything the other person is saying and doing.

And here is what I think that assumption should be. Regardless of how any verbal or nonverbal communication from another might feel to us, we need to assume the other person is ALWAYS acting from the highest intention he is capable of holding in that moment.  And, as a side note also present in the situation, the other person’s perception of what is the fairest and most authentic and even most generous response to us may well be (and often is) VERY different from ours.

And that is why we often don’t GET that the words or behavior of another is well-intentioned.   Sometimes even very generously intentioned.  We hold ourselves hostage, chained to the emotional default reaction rising up in us that our previous experiences have produced during similar circumstances.

I realize that I am suggesting that we act on something that we truly may not be seeing or perceiving in this moment...and, that is, the loving intention of the other to the best possible degree he can manage it.  Holding the belief I am suggesting calls for a beautiful sense of trust from us that everyone is always trying to act from the generous impulse to be a loving person. 

I truly believe that this is how we all enter life. With joy and celebration...with excitement and gratitude and appreciation.   However, our earth school experiences often offer significant detours from this loving path.  Consequently, we all carry wounds and scars waiting to be healed.  
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As we attempt to heal those wounds, we all find our own ways of making sense of things.  And, because we are unique individuals, the sense we make of things may be very different from what others envision.  There is also the fact that we have not walked in their shoes and are, therefore, not cognizant of the extent of their pain or the factors complicating their lives.  Nor have they walked in ours.

Each time I pause and gently ask another person to help me understand what his reaction meant, I am humbled by the explanation I receive of the beauty of what was intended in that moment.  A beauty that is often not visible to me because of my own emotional reaction to something that has triggered my distress. 

As a result of this I am now choosing to hold the strong intention of assuming the beauty of what is sourcing the words or actions of another and I am also intending to offer compassion and understanding for any distress he is experiencing. 

I am convinced that underneath the words we speak and actions we take towards each other there is always a beautiful, loving child wanting to interact with the glorious world around him with grace and fervor and delight.  And I very much want to feel and appreciate the innocence of this tender caring.

This profound awareness offers me a new guide ensuring a measure of ease and safety as I move through the interweaving and intersecting of what may appear to be a view so different and dissonant from my own.

Perhaps we can ease the intensity of all of our humanINTERSECTIONS by remembering the intentions sourced by our always loving hearts. 💗



                                                                               Marie Helena



image from Elizabeth Elkin's Painting a Day: trueartgallery.blogspot.com

GAME ON

Our country depends on free and fair elections to continue as a democracy. 

The actions of the President and the Postmaster General are compromising the fairness of the 2020 election.

If the President “owns” the post office, let’s bypass it.  Let’s look for another way.  It may be difficult.  It may be a huge challenge.  But we do not have to simply watch this abomination occur.  We need to be creative and determined to deal with this attempt to deny our citizens the right to vote.

Let’s put pressure on state leaders to develop a system that does not depend on the US Post Office.

Let’s keep thinking.

Let’s have the states (through their cities and counties) disperse ballots for the national election as individuals come to request them (in person or through intermediaries).

And let’s ensure that every state has a drop off location that is not associated with the Post Office.

Working together, using the power of our tenacity and determination, calling in ALL of our personal resources, we can get this done.

                                                      Marie Helena

image on Pinterest 

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