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Tuesday, May 21, 2019

The Ides of March






Let go of the need to defend your position.

       don Miguel Ruiz



It happens so easily to all of us.  We suddenly find ourselves in the middle of a highly spirited discussion and discover that we are face to face with an opposing or alternate perspective and so we automatically step into the role of “defender” of our position, digging in our heels...gently at first and then with increased vigor...as we set out to convince others of our point of view.  

What is it that encourages and even entices us to go for the “win”?  What is it that is driving this behavior that is so prevalent...and even predictable in the human psyche?

And, while we ponder that, imagine how disarming it would be to encounter an individual who has no need to convince everyone of the validity of his position, no need to be recognized by everyone as holding the "right" answer.


I had my own personal encounter with a situation like this a few years ago during a holiday gathering at our home.  It was a very subtle experience but later I strongly felt the significance of the moment.

Several people had been invited over for the holidays and we were chatting happily and enjoying the interchange.  I am not sure how we landed on this topic, but someone introduced the subject of 
The Ides of March.

At that point, I enthusiastically interjected myself into the conversation, remarking that I happened to know that The Ides of March fell on March 12th and that I knew this because The Ides of March was the birthday of a good friend of mine with whom I had worked.  One of our guests commented that The Ides of March was actually on March 15th.   At this observation, I strongly asserted that I was certain it was the 12th and that I had a memory of holding a very specific intention to recall that particular date.  After my interjection our guest declined to assert his belief that March 15 was the date in question and the group moved on past the consideration of the event’s date to its actual meaning.

By the way, Wikipedia describes The Ides of March as "a day in the calendar notable for the Romans as a deadline for settling debts."


This little incident was long forgotten by me until  a few months later on March 15 when I happened to hear a commentator announce that it was The Ides of March.

Oooooops!  I thought and looked online to verify this unexpected piece of information.  As I absorbed the correction, two thoughts circled in my brain.  The first was:  How did I ever confuse this date and become so convinced that I had it right?  The second was:  What a considerate
guest we had hosted at our home that evening during the holidays.  The visitor had obviously known his information was right and yet he chose not to make a point of debating this with me in front of the others.

This gesture of his felt important to me.  I saw this behavior as evidence of his generosity and thoughtfulness and I made a point of telling him so the next time we spoke.


How refreshing it had been to engage with someone who was not harboring a strong competitive need to prove his point.  And, on the fifteenth of March, the point was made for itself quietly and with no aggressive fanfare.


This choice of action of our guest that night most certainly revealed his honoring and understanding of human emotions.  Giving me the opportunity to learn for myself what I did not know was actually very profound.  He clearly saw that the date itself was not the primary issue and neither was emerging as the person who had all of the answers.  

He had no need to engage in a battle of rightness; he just wanted the opportunity to plant the seed of what he knew to be true.

This individual was obviously able to enter into a moment and quietly leave his gentle signature on it, inviting others to engage with the information in the perfect moment for them.  No need to defend...just a subtle awareness and affirmation of how we learn best when we are in the most relaxed and curious frame of mind.

What a splendid idea!  No “debt settling” of The Ides of March...rather just an eloquent exploration.


                                                                                                 Marie Helena

Friday, May 17, 2019

Drifting



Now that the beautiful blush of spring is finding its way onto the universal earth campus, there will be a myriad of opportunities to indulge our awakening senses. 

Gazing at the beautiful blossoms gently emerging on the branches of welcoming trees.  Spying the sprightly, chattering birds returning to their home bases.  And lazily watching the cottony clouds roll by. Rolling in a soft, billowy fashion… Drifting… gently drifting...quietly finding their way.



Just contemplating the drifting clouds feels like a meditation to me.  And I wonder if it has to do with the very concept of drifting.  That word feels like ease to me.  Sprezzatura... the Italians might call it...effortless elegance.


Does the effortless elegance I perceive here manifest itself to me because the clouds have aligned with their nature and are simply...and profoundly... being who they are? 


What if we, like the clouds, were to align with OUR nature:  Divine beings playing on our verdant, lush planet of infinite possibility?


If we could recognize our magical playground, perhaps we would find it easier to embrace our self-designed challenges and gently direct ourselves into a reframing of what feels like difficult circumstances from our earth school view. 

,
Perhaps then we could move on to envision and embrace the gentle changes, the shifts in behavior, which could incrementally bring us into alignment with our Higher Selves.  In the most loving, harmonious way. DRIFTING  back into the beautiful beings we truly are.


                                                                                   Marie Helena





image from pinterest

Friday, May 10, 2019

Divine Feminine Energy





As we celebrate the beautiful occasion of  Mother's Day, my thoughts are drawn to the power and beauty and significance of Love as it is expressed in Divine feminine energyThis beautiful Grace which streams so elegantly from the hearts of women.  Such an exquisite blessing.  It seems to be their birthright . . . their gift to the world.


Somehow, women intuitively know that when someone is experiencing pain, in that moment there is nothing more powerful, more healing than for that person to feel understood To have someone mirror back to them an understanding of the intensity of their pain or distress and how it is affecting them.

This essential longing to be understood is a vital part of the human condition.  Without this loving kindness it is difficult for an individual to move forward into an acknowledgment of what is transpiring.  And, without that acknowledgment, that acceptance, it is impossible to move through the experience to the other side. . . . to the peace that comes through Surrender.

The feminine heart holds the key to the unfolding of this process.  We are all so in need of this exquisite form of compassion.  When we receive it, we find the energy to lead ourselves through the dark night of the soul.  This precious feminine offering is the antidote to loneliness, to abandonment.  It promotes caring, a sense of safety, connection.

Because our world is changing and evolving it is wonderful to note that feminine energy is now being expressed by males as well. And, in return, masculine energy is leading by example the demonstration of the importance and value of steadfastness and devotion.

How wonderful that we an all minister to each other, sharing the precious and pleasing endowments of our earthly lives!


                                                                      Marie Helena


                                                             
image on Pinterest
Joyce Hicks watercolor

Tuesday, May 7, 2019

A Plum in the Pudding






 
Souls are tempered in the depth of experience, growing in inner strength and unyielding courage.

       
Chinese saying





Codependency is the inability to maintain one's boundaries, choosing instead to take on and feel responsible for the problems and concerns of others. 

And it is a wild ride. 

 
Codependency is annoying,  irritating, frustrating...a maelstrom of upsetting emotionsIt is completely exhausting being affected by things that have nothing to do with you.  But, for the codependent, that's how things go down.  



But this "pudding" of ever emerging irritation has a plum in it
(and the plum blossom is a symbol of STRENGTH). 


The irritation experienced by the codependent person is so blatant it's difficult to ignore.  No easy sweeping it under the rug.  It's so big, so there, so very THERE.


Depending on others for our well-being IS a tumultuous undertaking in which we relinquish our power to create and control our lives.  And it's not an easy position to abandon, having been led to it by unhealed pain resting so heavily in our heart.


The fact is it is nearly impossible for the codependent who has been TRIGGERED to ignore the emotional chaos and clamor he is experiencing.  And therein lies the plum in this pudding. 



When the pain of codependency becomes so very intense, there is an overwhelming urge to find a solution to the suffering. And the solution begins with acknowledging that the pain is there.

Recognizing, acknowledging and owning our pain is the beginning of a direct path to healing and resolution as there is something very POWERFUL about finally naming our angst.


It occurs to me that this very naming…this "owning" of our discordant emotions...may be the externalizing of a subconscious impulse.
  Perhaps it is the impulse…the irresistible impulse… of a highly sensitive person who senses that what is transpiring between himself and another is off kilter on one side or the other or on both sides of the equation.

And, on some level, this highly sensitive person wants to put things right but is not sure how to go about this and, therefore, what emerges, instead, is unease..,anxiety...irritation... or fear. 



Our emotions are the barometer which gives us the reading on our inner weather, indicating when we are off courseEsther Hicks (channeling Abraham) tells us that when we are upset or distraught or are experiencing anything that feels negative, it is because our actions are not in harmony with Who We Truly Are.  We are not in resonance with our beautiful Source energy.  And it doesn't feel good.



The question is:  What do we do about this upsetting feeling?  Where do we go next to put this anxiety to rest?



It is usually the "codependent" person who is experiencing the most upset in a situation such as this.
  That is not to say that the other person is not distraught.  However, his level of anxiety may be less and he may have pushed that anxiety below the surface and is not actively addressing the issue. 

 

Because the highly sensitive codependent person cannot easily ignore his emotional and physical symptoms, this is a perfect time for him to find some relief by taking the lead in solving the problem and, at the same time, introducing an element of healing into the encounter.



In a time of conflict or unease, it is important for both individuals to honor themselves by relating to the other what it is that would be helpful and supportive to them in this circumstance.
  The codependent person can begin this process and encourage the other person to join him.  When both individuals do this in a gentle manner without any expectation or attachment to how the other will respond, a beautiful ease is infused into the moment.  Each person assesses his own energy level, communicates that to the other and suggests what he is able and willing to do to help both individuals to get their needs met and find a resolution to the problem.

 

The decision to be present in THIS moment rather than stuck in old patterns of reaction coming from unhealed hurt can propel the codependent person into a new way of response, diffusing old subconscious vestiges of pain that have chosen to show themselves and which now see there is no need for them to be replayed. 

What a BLESSING when the codependent individual can courageously recognize and embrace his discord and use that energy to lead himself and another to a loving and peaceful resolution to a problem which has caused him so much concern.



The sensitivity of the "codependent" person can be a wonderful blessing not only to himself but to everyone he encounters, inspiring creative and loving responses to moments of chaos and unrest, 



And I wonder...
Is it the nature of the Divine Universe to tuck the mysteriously important plums into all of our puddings?



                                                                 Marie Helena

 

image from etsy.com

Monday, April 29, 2019

The Magnificent Licorice Jellybean

Easter Sunday dinner at my daughter’s home is always a wonderful event. Sunshine streams through her home, evidenced in so many ways.  One way is through the awesome messages that appear in some form of art on her walls…

Have an amazing day.
Listen with your whole heart.
Be the change you wish to see in the world.
Love well.


My daughter and her family are also a source of Sunshine as they always greet visitors with open arms and warm, affectionate hugs, expressing their delight to have someone enter into the flow of their day.


Another way that Light shines through in this loving oasis is in the beautiful way she decorates for each season and holiday, celebrating all events of the changing calendar In order of their appearance on Mother earth.

And, on this particular Sunday, Easter, of course, was in full bloom in all of its glory.  All of the family’s favorite dishes had been prepared and  a very special signature Easter delight could be found in the center of the table:  a brilliantly colored assortment of jellybeans had casually arranged themselves as they were lovingly poured into a glass dish to bask in their Easter springtime glory.

And, as I fondly remember the lovely occasion, I ask:  Who has not experienced and delighted in the robust yet petite extravaganza of taste that is the jellybean!


After finishing our dinner, I eyed the brightly colored, tempting gems in their dish still reigning with such pomp and pageantry in the center of all of the festivities. 

It is time, I thought.  Definitely time for me to indulge in  this Easter delight   Perusing all of the available flavors, I selected what would be THE jellybean of my day.  To the chagrin of a few individuals still nearby, I selected the licorice jellybean.  Apparently, this was not a flavor of jellybean favored by them but, as a connoisseur of licorice, I could not have been happier.  

Now here is what I find to be most significant about my spectacular Easter jellybean:   
I only needed one.

ONE solitary jellybean, unadorned by a parade of cousin jellies, burst happily into its robust flavor as I took my first bite.  ONE jellybean satisfied my search for the perfect sweet ending to the lovely meal.  ONE delicious licorice jellybean evoked my culinary adoration.

There was no need to eat a second… in fact, it seemed as if a second would somehow dim the glory of the initial experience.


To me, it feels like my licorice jellybean “moment” that day was a microcosm of all of our life experiences.  It is a fact that I had been filled with lovely anticipation of the Easter celebration and also bathed in sunshine vibrations at my daughter’s home, but it is also true that the first...and only...bite was GLORIOUS and so wonderfully and engagingly SATISFYING.

What if we could reside in that incredible state of awe where EVERY FIRST MOMENT we encountered held something magical and entertained or delighted us or
 taught us something we did not already know.  What if our first taste, our first encounter could springboard us into new wonder or knowledge or appreciation!

It so easy to move quickly past the initial moment of our experiences, missing the majesty of each and every first encounter.

 Can you imagine the  magnificent “licorice jellybeans” just waiting to burst into our lives!


                                                                                           Marie Helena

image frjom unixtitan.net

Tuesday, April 23, 2019

Pushing ALL the Buttons


When you are working with technology and find yourself faced with a MEGA-variety of technical options (you have probably already noticed my overreaction to this hot-button-for-me subject), do you ever do what I do...find yourself pushing ALL of the buttons? 

Not all at once...but, if the first button does not produce the desired result, I start tapping every button nearby, na├»vely expecting one of them to read my mind and give me what I want.  It makes me laugh just to think about this silly solution.  But that’s what I do when I’m stressed. It’s hard to think clearly and logically and frustrating to discover that I am unable to identify with the mindset of the web designers.  (I have been instructed by a few people that if you can relax and try to think like the web designers do, you can probably figure things out.)

Not so.  At least not for me.  When faced with this dilemma, I make an immediate call to my university professor daughter who is well schooled in technology.  Directly after she expresses her compassion about my “crisis” and identifies with my frustration, she usually asks me the same question:  “Have you tried to Google this?”  My answer is usually…… “Hmmmmm, not yet.”  Whereupon, I dutifully go back and execute a search for the answer to my dilemma and I am always astounded to find that someone has nearly always already asked my question and that the answer is waiting for me.

Which brings me to the point of my story.  The someones of whom I speak who have already asked the question and evoked the answer they are looking for seem to me to be a metaphor for what is known as Infinite Intelligence...which is miraculously and magically available to ALL of us.

Owen Waters, international spiritual teacher, explains in his essay on fields of consciousness that “the largest part of your complete consciousness is your superconscious mind.   Also called the higher self or the soul, this is the source of intuitive information.  Your superconscious mind is connected to Infinite Being, which is the spiritual source of all things, and also to the entire universe.”

Waters goes on to say “there is ten times more to the brain than the one-tenth that people are aware of each day.  That means that people have at least ten times the potential that they thought they had and, thanks to the inner being's connection to Infinite Being, that potential can go all the way up to infinity.  You just have to decide how much of your field of consciousness you intend to use.


How is this done you might ask.  Owen  Waters says you can “choose to pay attention to the still, small voice within”.   You can “choose to ask it for information to encourage the flow of inner wisdom into your outer awareness.”  You can also “choose to follow your inner joy as it leads you towards greater fulfillment in your voyage through life.”


I hear you, Owen, and I am ALL IN.

Instead of pushing ALL of the buttons as I do in my misguided techno-adventures trying frantically to find “the” answer to my problem, I can...

take a slow, deep, refreshing breath and remember I am surrounded by the depth and breadth of Infinite Intelligence just waiting to share the complete and immeasurable universe of available knowledge and information with my eager heart.  YES!!!



                                                                                               Marie Helena


image from Freepik

Tuesday, April 16, 2019

The Bird with the Loudest (and Softest) Song






I listened to the BIRD with the loudest song as dawn was breaking today.  It was telling all the other birds to wake up. 

 It did not call out as it thought it was the boss; it called out from  the feeling that all should be rejoicing with the beginning of a new day. 

Its sole purpose was to wake all the other birds as it had a message to share.  Because the message was shared from a feeling...it touched the hearts of all the other birds and not a single bird ignored the call.


                    Lexie Henderson


Can you imagine a world in which every message we hear (like the song of the bird) is shared from a deep feeling of the heart...a world in which every message represents a profound and awesome truth about how someone has been affected by life, what someone has discovered, perhaps, or how they have become elated, bliss-ful and filled with joy?

Wouldn't those messages be ones we would not want to miss...because they are so powerful and authentic and real...so truth-telling and so instructive?

Undoubtedly, there would be something in the sound or sense of the message that would compel our attention, our engagement, our happiness-sharing, our joy.

These messages would help us understand our world and the persons who inhabit it.  They would help us understand ourselves and how we connect with others through the Divine Matrix.

The "birds" with the loudest songs sing the most powerfully because they have worked through something important in their lives.  They have had an epiphany and they are joyfully trumpeting their message.


But what about the "birds"  (please read people) who have not finished their processing?  

 Most of us fall into that category at some time in our lives.   

These birds are a work-in-progress.  Their "songs" are not the loudest, nor the most powerful. Rather they are a reaching out to others for understanding, for support, for affirmation, for compassion...and, most importantly, for connection.

But we cannot connect if we do not hear their songs.



Perhaps our role in life is to celebrate the "loudest" bird songs which reveal the joyful moments of someone's connection

and

to  listen ever more closely to the softest, tenderest, weakest songs being trilled by birds whose wings need our support, attention and love.

      
                                                                            Marie Helena
 
image from dianaevans.blogspot.com.