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Saturday, September 14, 2019

Gone Fishing

It seems that fishermen know a lot of secrets. 
They so enjoy sitting quietly and patiently…letting the sun shine down on them, noticing the occasional ripple in the water.I have this theory that they may be the world’s great philosophers…not so much because they are thinking things over but rather because they are just intuitively enjoying exactly where they are.  

One of the smartest things fishermen do is the very process of how they interact with what is waiting in the water. They throw their lines in…directly, with careful, patient aim…watch them slip into the water and then they wait.

It’s that waiting that is so intriguing. Fisherman will wait forever just to see what will happen. They will not try to force the situation. They know better. They have an innate instinct that things will unfold in their own time

And it’s anyone’s guess what their line will connect with…could be a fish or other sea creature but could also be an old shoe. When a fish comes in, they relish the moment…checking to see exactly what kind it is…how much it measures and weighs…what kind of condition it is in. When an old shoe or part of a tire comes in, they laugh, disentangle their line and calmly and with great equanimity and patience, they try again.

Here’s where I see THE GREAT FISHING METAPHOR. The fisherman engaging with what is in the water is ametaphor for how we choose to communicate/engage with one another. 

The fisherman’s effort is considered and direct…he wishes to engage the fish immediately, if possible.

But, if the fish does not respond directly to the overture, the fisherman is not thrown by this development… he takes note of the situation and continues the process of waiting.

He ENJOYS the process of waiting. 
He wants to see what will develop.

The fisherman’s artistry is his pure enjoyment of the process…watching its unfolding.

How wonderful if we could communicate with each other in this same way. If, after we speak directly and with considered intent, we wait patiently… and ENJOY waiting patiently… while the person we are communicating with decides how he wants to respond to the invitation.

Not much room here for chaos or disruption…just a fisherman casting out his line and waiting to see what will arrive… or a person connecting energetically with another’s process of response.

Gone Fishing. Perhaps a very wise sign we should all decide to live by.

                                    Marie Helena

Wednesday, September 11, 2019

Ways to Show Love to Our Cells

Providing an Environment So That Cells Can Do Their Work of Healing

Get in the sunshine
Spend time out in nature 
Get near water
Take a passeggiata (Italian walk for the sheer joy of moving with 
    no particular objective in mind)
Walk fast or play sports for aerobic value
Observe birds, squirrels, deer, and flowers, trees, shrubs, grass, etc.
Do physical activity that is fun for you
Sleep 8 or 9 hours each night
Relax before bedtime
Eat nutritious, non-toxic food
Drink purified water
Eat slowly and mindfully
Honor the body’s signals of hunger and satiety
Honor all of the signals of the body (pain and pleasure)
Deep breathe
Find the things that bring you joy/bliss
Accept life (honor the innate nature of things as they unfold; do not 
   interfere with this rhythm.)
Honor the paths and journeys of others
Feel and express gratitude
Recognize the gifts of your life and the lessons which are there for 
Trust that you have all you need
Speak your truth and listen to others’ truth
Communicate with gentleness and love
Accept responsibility for your actions
Give a heartfelt apology when you feel you have made a mistake
Grieve your losses freely
Focus on the positive
Keep your environment clear and non-toxic
Decide things for yourself; listen to what is in your heart, not the opinions 
    of others 

Monday, September 2, 2019

What's the Name on Your Marquee?


Can you see yourself in a luminous spotlight...an emanation that moves when you move...goes where you go...beautifully illuminating your corner of the world?    
This SPOTLIGHT is a physical expression of your BOUNDARY...the place which you occupy and where no one else belongs.
From this vantage point you can view all the many other spotlights around you, each shining on other persons.  You can be an OBSERVER as each individual lives his life...writes his own story.  And, most importantly, you can clearly see the difference between their spotlights and yours.

And here is the most important part...

When someone standing near you makes a move (no matter what the emotional content...no matter whether it is an affirming gesture or an annoying one), it is clearly a part of their spotlight, NOT YOURS.  It may feel like it is coming at you, but it is NOT YOUR STUFF.

It is an indication of where that person is and that's all it is.  

It may feel like an arrow shot into your heart but that will only be because you have crossed from your boundary over into theirs and have tapped into something you do not own.

Somehow...for some reason...you have decided that you are NOT the determiner of your life and that you NEED CO-PILOTS to tell you how to feel.
You are letting these co-pilots decide whether you will be happy or sad.  You are, in fact, borrowing their baggage and making it yoursNow your happiness is out of your control.  it depends on what someone else thinks or says...does or doesn't do.

And it doesn't need to be this way.   

We are truly the most wonderful pilots all on our own.  

We do not need to have someone give us our happiness.  We do not have to wait for someone to deal us that card. 

And, conversely, we do not have to attach ourselves to their problems.  

When someone is out of sorts and speaks to us in a disturbing manner, we only need realize that it is something they are going through and a part of their story.                

It's NOT our holdings.  

It's NOT a part of our spotlight.  

Somehow we have blurred the boundaries and can no longer see what is ours and what is theirs.
Other persons' spotlights do not belong to us.
When we recognize this, we can clearly see that our happiness or lack of it does not depend on what they say or do.


The decision to be happy or sad is ours and ours alone and once we see how the spotlights are designed and delineated, we realize that WE are the determiners of the content, the dreams and the joys of our own life.

Writer, director, producer and actor...we inhabit all of these roles.  If we let someone else take over, we have misplaced our power and we suffer for it.

What's the name on your marquee?

                                                                                   Marie Helena

image from llmcountryclub.com 

Wednesday, August 28, 2019

Altering the Chemistry of the Moment

One of the major causes of disappointment we experience in our lives is the unrealized expectation we may hold about what we want to occur.  When we are feeling anxious about what is about to happen, it is so easy to, hopefully, imagine things playing out in a way that feels comfortable and even soothing to us. Just contemplating this possibility softens our anxiety so much that we become emotionally invested in the outcome we prefer and then we become attached to it occurring in reality. And, if life intervenes (as it inevitably does) and things do not occur in the way we imagined, we feel sad, bereft, abandoned, unworthy.

It feels like our life is collapsing around us.  Everything is going wrong. There appears to be no emotional support.  But it is only the illusion we are holding that has collapsed.

This can feel like a major upset and, sadly, we have brought it upon ourselves. 

Why do we become so attached to these expectations regarding what we want to happen in our lives? Why do we rely so intensely on a "picture" we have painted by ourselves when that picture will always be created by everyone included in the encounter?

I believe we attach to our expectation because we do not feel safe or secure enough to reveal the longings of our heart for affirmation, acceptance, validation and that is because we have experienced the pain of not having those longings filled in the past.   And now we carry the baggage of this sadness and cannot bring ourselves to trust that these longings will ever be realized.  And, lacking that trust, we do not reveal our authentic emotions, consoling ourselves instead by imagining circumstances in our ideal world that would perfectly meet our needs.  As if everyone would automatically know what would bring us joy and peace and have the energy to bring them into our lives.

The problem here is that we become obsessed with the expectation from our imagining, holding fast to this "fix" we feel we so desperately need, crowding out any possible concern for others who are involved in the drama of the moment. 

In real life we are not the only ones with needs.  All of the players in our lives also have needs but the scenario we imagine in which our longings are realized does not take those needs into account.  We are entirely focused on our pain.  We walk into the theater of our imagining expecting to see the play we "bought a ticket for" and, lo and behold, another production is playing.

We miss the vital information of how each player is being affected in this moment because our hurt, our unmet need, has clearly overridden this important aspect of the encounter.  When we find ourselves becoming attached to an expectation, it is important to extend some beautiful compassion to ourselves.  We are carrying pain and it is pain"ful”.  As we relax into the love we are showing ourselves, a new sense of empowerment begins to grow within us and we begin to experience the energy we need to help ourselves heal from the emotional pain we are suffering.  We do this by sharing the longings of our heart. 

This is a wonderful and important opportunity for us to be BRAVE and COURAGEOUS and consciously vulnerable, to change the default pattern of how we respond to the sadness of not having our needs met. When others hear us authentically express what is in our heart,
the chemistry of the moment alters in a profound way.

There is a beautiful gift embedded in this undertaking.  When we take responsibility for finding a way to meet the longings of our heart, we feel EMPOWERED and in control of our lives.  And, from that place of power, our heart is open to hearing the needs of others and then co-creating together with them the very best way to take care of all persons involved in this moment.

To do this is to walk out of the stance of victimhood and, simultaneously, to free ourselves from the suffering we have inadvertently brought upon ourselves because we had not yet found a way to move beyond our sadness. But the answer to relieving the sadness IS in our reach. And it will take a STRONG DESIRE to heal ourselves and the BELIEF that WE ARE WORTHY of love and that others want to love us in whatever way they can based on the energy that is available to them in that moment of their lives.

There is so much we can do to move beyond the painful default reactions we carry.  Our usual go-to places.  As Alberto Villoldo suggests in his book Courageous Dreaming, become the hero of your life, daring to speak from the depths of your heart revealing your human vulnerability. You will access a loving generosity, a power beyond measure that will alter the trajectory of your life and everyone who moves within it.

Marie Helena

image from pinterest

Friday, August 16, 2019

Leaping Off the Endgrain

Sell your CLEVERNESS and purchase BEWILDERMENT.

13th century Sufi mystic  

Cleverness is a process of the mind.

In cleverness we use our mental faculties to assess, analyze, plan and strategize.

We move things around so they will operate to our best advantage. We are concerned with how we will benefit from a situation...how we will be protected...what we will gain for our trouble.

Bewilderment comes from a connection with the heart.

We are struck by the innate beauty of something..deeply moving, transported to some mysterious and unknown place.  

We willingly give up control and let our hearts lead us through wonder to some new and fascinating destination.

We leap off the endgrain for the sheer joy of the exploration...to see what there is to see and learn what there is to discover.

We give up control of our experience and LET THE EXPERIENCE LEAD US.

CLEVERNESS keeps us tightly inside control center.

BEWILDERMENT connects us with joy and
 opens us to worlds of energy of which we are perhaps not even aware.

The world is now moving to this beautiful place of heart-centeredness but our instructions for this journey have been made clear by prophets for centuries.

We must release our distraction with maintaining control over the gifts of the universe and insteaddelight and revel in their wonder.

                                           Marie Helena

Image courtesy of people-clipart.com

Sunday, August 11, 2019

Lost and Found

I just wrote a beautiful blog about ALBERT EINSTEIN and then accidentally deleted it.  

Amazingly, I am not freaking out over the loss.  And, it's really amazing...because ordinarily something like this would register BIG TIME   my annoyance radar.

And I'm wondering why it's different this time. 

I found myself going to the place of asking what is the message here.  

And my daughter Rachel suggested to me that perhaps this means that I have truly integrated my goal of understanding that all of life is here to deliver messages and it is important to keep a watchful eye open for them. 

That sounds really great to me....to find that my belief is determining my action.  And that I no longer have to stretch to make the connection... my body is already doing it for me.

And maybe that is why the first blog got lost and this one got written. 


In a conceptual sense, it's cool to see that my focus and determination (my desire to find the "messages" waiting for me) can actually prompt a default button for me...keeping my body calm and relaxed and making it much easier to carry out my aspirations.

And, in a very specific application of my theory...it's  wonderful to have your body respondin such a supportive way to the idea that everything is here to help us

Which, by the way, was the subject of the lost blog post:   
Albert Einstein's quote that the most important question we ever have to ask ourselves is WHETHER OR NOT THE UNIVERSE IS A FRIENDLY PLACE.

Apparently, I just answered it by experiencing calm and by trusting and appreciating my body's reaction to an unanticipated and undesired turn of events.

Maybe my telling the story of the the losing of the blog is the more important way to deliver Einstein's message.  

There goes the Universe...helping me out again!

image from smileemusic.blogspot.com

Sunday, July 28, 2019

The Storyteller

Don't be distracted by your stories.

don Miguel Ruiz

Everyone loves a good story... and we especially love OUR OWN stories.  And that is because we get to cast ourselves in the roles we are attracted to for subconscious reasons.  We can be the brilliant hero or the preyed upon victim.  We can be the perpetrator if we tend to judge ourselves mercilessly...or a bit player if we feel invisible and that nobody “sees” us.

We all have stories that “explain” our lives...a popular practice that makes sense of what is happening to us.  The problem is that once we decide on what our”role” is, we typecast ourselves in it and find it exceedingly difficult to look more deeply into and revise the story that we have become comfortable with and that now comprises the identity we assign ourselves.

don Miguel Ruiz, Toltec spiritualist, counsels us not to be distracted by our stories for they are only the illusions that represent what we are able to see so far.  And he wants us to grow.

Jean Atman, Ascension and Energy Medicine Specialist, offers us a deeper view:
What many people don't realize is that the people we engage with will always mirror who we are on the inside

While  these individuals with whom we engage may look completely different and separate from us, they are really only a cogent reflection of who we are for WE create our world and WE populate it with fascinating characters who have much to tell us.  We create them so that we can see ourselves.  And we have not done this on a conscious level. This creation is a spiritual exercise that may on a superficial level confuse and confound us.  In fact, we may not feel ANY connection with some of their behavior.  But there is SOMETHING they are doing that holds the potential to help us discover what we may have never recognized nor suspected about ourselves.

Fortunately, the characters we create also exist to illustrate the beautiful accomplishments of our lives.  These generous, compassionate Individuals mirror our same attributes just as the dysfunctional, fragmented individuals hold the clues to issues buried deep in our psyche.

There is something fascinating and powerful about these scenarios.  Each of us has the earth assignment of returning to our essential self as a creature of Love, recognizing, acknowledging, owning and releasing our fear based behaviors.  And the assorted characters who populate the landscape of our lives give us important checkpoints about our progress and the problems with which we still struggle.

What an intriguing (and challenging) way to become aware of where we reside in our personal journeys.  In every case, a masterpiece of soul projection.  Don’t be distracted from discovering their powerful revelations.

                                          Marie Helena

Carmen Cicero on View at June Kelly