There are certain moments in our lives when it becomes extremely important to us to have the attention and energy and focus of another. We have a sense of need, of urgency...and, if that need is not met, we struggle with feeling lost, alone, frustrated, possibly even abandoned. The dominant perception we experience at this point is the feeling of: Where were you? I needed you. You were not here for me.
And, from the outward look of things, that interpretation seems right on. They were not WITH us. They were not HERE.
But, WHERE, then, were they? And the answer to that question holds some very important information ABOUT the person who APPEARED to leave us standing in distress and also FOR the person who was requesting their attention.
But we usually don't travel down that path of information gathering, staying mired instead in the chaotic energy of these reactions...
YOU didn't answer me.
YOU weren't listening.
YOU don't care about how I feel.
But the very fact that someone has "left the building" in our hour of need points to the existence of an unresolved quagmire, a fear or anxiety or, perhaps, a need as great or greater than ours that has been buried but is still making unmistakable sounds of protest. And what looks like a conscious decision on the part of another that we are not important to them may be an unrelenting, subconscious echo that is their distinct cry for help that has somehow gotten buried and is now revealing itself in an awkward way, drawing attention away from the crisis of OUR moment of need.
And yet it seems there may be a SPIRITUAL connection between our need and the issue that is subtly trumping our cry for assistance. And, by pausing to consciously give our full attention to what is manifesting in another's behavior, we may find information that illuminates issues in the relationship, softens our energy and inspires our compassion regarding the pain or distress that has captured our companion's attention.
And, when this new tenderness graces our heart, it is not long before it is returned in kind to us and both parties find it possible to honor what is important to each other.
The behavior I describe requires an intense stepping up from and beyond the pain that is tugging at our heart. Not a typical response when it feels like someone is walking away
It is not easy to maintain an awareness of others when we are feeling lost in the turbulent sea of our own emotions. But strength of character, the ability to widen our perspective and the wisdom to trust that the Universe connects us all provides access to the unfolding of the highest good for all involved.
Cutting edge. Stunning personal evolution.
image from enotes.com