We’ve all heard the very practical advice of putting our toe into the water before we jump in. And very often we do. But, occasionally, our “enthusiasm” gets the better of us and we leap first.
And sometimes with unfortunate results.
One place the foolhardiness of this is most evident is in interpersonal relationships.
And here’s how it goes.
WE are ready to roll and off we go…with whatever emotion has sprung up for us.
This could be the excitement of a new idea for something to try (which might mean some work for everyone involved). It could be the expression of our displeasure at something that has just occurred. It could be our wild, crazy side rocking an impulse to “seize the day”.
However, we could be jumping into some turbulent waters if we ASSUME that someone is ready to be in the same space with us. So much could be transpiring emotionally with another person that we are not aware of.
There could be some sadness or anxiety we don't know about or, possibly, exhaustion...and our jumping into our “dance” could feel strange to them and, possibly, even unwelcome.
There is a very gentle way to navigate these waters and that is with an ENERGY AUDIT.
This is a very important information exchange that needs to occur before we ASSUME that someone is ready for us. It can come through words or non-verbal behavior but it is always a very wise move to test the waters of someone else’s emotional altitude before we zoom in for a landing.
And, it’s important for us to share where we are on the emotional map, too.
This gentle checkpoint approach will help make both people aware of each other’s inside story and will give good direction on how to proceed at this point or not.
So many misunderstandings and awkward moments can be avoided if we appraise someone’s store of emotional energy before we bring our own to the mix.
Energy audit…a prelude to a very successful communication experience!
originally published May 25, 2011